Time for Scrooge to weigh in on the holidays..

Bear with me here – I’m writing this while helping my boyfriend long-distance shop for shirts (how ironic).

Here in Canada we have a holiday on the 26th of December, which is known as Boxing Day. For those of you who aren’t familiar with Boxing Day – it has nothing to do with boxes, nor is it a celebration of the sport of boxing (how dare they — boxes are GREAT). It is essentially a Black Friday equivalent, where people extend their Christmas lists and use the sales as an excuse to go credit card crazy — one final time (I swear). This damned event is now practically an entire 2 weeks, which makes someone like myself (who is largely a saver) dread doing basic day-to-day things like grocery shop, where I purchase essentials like steak (if they’re on sale), takeaway containers (buy one, get one free), and a vast array of yoghurt & kefir products (did you know your GUT is your body’s major mood regulator? — GOOGLE IT).

In years past, I’d flock to the stores like anyone else. I made attempts attain happiness by making sure I had at least a handful of amazing new things (SO AMAZING), and I’d beam with excitement (the most fucked up sense of pride) as people saw me carrying my new goodies through the mall. This comparable-to-heroin-high fades like it always does, and eventually I’d be latching onto the next apparent source for happiness. With that said — the makeup and clothes I’ve purchased from years back were pretty great buys. Just sayin’. Now that I don’t want to buy any of the stuff, I’m actually using what I’ve bought in previous years.

What’s changed? Did I reach Nirvana? Am I like that frugal creep on TLC, who pees into bottles to avoid flushing her toilet? I, like many people today, am in debt. While I still maintain good credit, it was about two years ago that I started getting more of a handle on my finances. Once you face your finances, and start paying off your credit cards and student loans, saving money actually becomes fun (yes, I am a loser). On the rare occasion that I do shop, my mind is occupied with thoughts of, “do I need that?” or “will that benefit my life in any major long-term way?” If the answer is no, I’m probably not going to buy it (especially if it is full price). Of course there are some exceptions, as I still like to enjoy a glass of whiskey somewhat regularly (no, this isn’t where I tell you I’m a drunk). I have never noticed, nor will I ever accept, that the 2-3 bottles or less of whiskey that I buy in a month cause any damage to my finances(I ain’t buyin’ Cristal).

P-Diddy-Cris

On top of my general distaste for 99% of the human population, drastically cutting down on spending has limited my social life, because I no longer go out to bars, clubs, or restaurants – that I don’t really care to go, in the first place. My boyfriend is also a fabulous cook and personal chef, so going out to eat is pretty much the equivalent of breaking up with him (in the worst way). As someone who thrives online, and has a boyfriend who lives several hundred miles away (we see one another for about a week, once every month), the local social scene has little to offer me. I’m sure it is do-able if you wish to have a hip-happening social life, but all I want is a cool skin care blog, and unlimited green tea.

When I am rolling my millions in ten years, you can thank me for inspiring you to save. Now if you’ll excuse me, the dog I’m currently caring for (yes, I make money over the holidays) needs me to wipe her disgusting jowls.

Was this post too Jew-y for you?